Day 08 — A photo that makes you angry/sad

There’s a picture of my great grandma and I by ourselves.  She is sitting on my grandma’s ugly old green couch, slightly bent to hold me up because I’m beginning to learn to walk.  I can only see a small portion of her face.  This picture is right next to my bed.  I look at it every day, multiple times, and especially before I go to sleep I sometimes start to cry.


I cry because this is the only picture (that I know of) that I have with her and I in it.  My sister and I had planned on asking to take family photos on Christmas day last year.  We knew.  And then we forgot.  Family came and presents got opened, and food got eaten and we all took naps.  But we forgot about taking just one photo.


And then I went to my dad’s to spend the week after with him and his girlfriend.  When I said goodbye to her, she was lying on the couch and almost asleep, and she asked me where I was going, and why.  And I told her.  And I told her that I would be back to see her in a week, and she smiled and kissed me on the cheek and I gave her a hug and I left, sobbing.


The next day I got a call that she was on oxygen.  She couldn’t sit up on her own.  She needed help with everything.  I started sobbing in front of my dad’s girlfriend’s family, and said I didn’t want to go back because I had just gotten there and it would be too much trouble for my dad to drive the two hours to take me back to see her.


That night, I dreamed about when I told her goodbye.  I woke up crying, and all I heard was myself telling her “I’m going to come back soon. I’ll be back.”  So I went back that morning.


That night she died.


So hold your loved ones close.  Keep your promises.  Remember every laugh, every tear, every angry moment and every moment of forgiveness.


And remember to take that picture.


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